He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
Randomize
