SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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