So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Randomize
