Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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