I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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