Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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