But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
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Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
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I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
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