He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
