You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize
