i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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