if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Randomize
