where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
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I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
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