who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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