I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Randomize