why didn't you poke me back
I wish you could order shots online.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize