I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
