I woke up to her vacumming the grass
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
PANTIES FOUND
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