what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
