I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
