walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
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