You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize