i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Randomize
