I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Randomize
