I like my sex mixed with concussions.
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
We need to get me chipped asap
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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