i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
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