Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
These 25 Women First Experienced Sexual Harassment At A Shocking Age
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.