So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
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