if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
nutella sex= disaster
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
