here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize
