"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
