sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Randomize
