That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
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