Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize