Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
id be glad to
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Randomize
