I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Randomize
