do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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