Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
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