i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I smell like Dick and happiness
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize