Having a random hookup so left but love u
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
You need a sexual gate keeper
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Randomize
