a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Congratulations! We have a period
Randomize
