All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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