im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
