I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
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its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
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She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
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