Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Randomize
