it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Randomize
