Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize