Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
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