Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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