nut hugger
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Small penises have feelings too.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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