Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
it hurts more in the daytime
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
