also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
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